There are very few practices in the world that can match with the ancientness and dynamism of parenting. Ancient, because parenting is embedded with the inherent desire of the living organisms to live and multiply, and it is dynamic, because it always deals with the issues of the present time. Thus parenting would never lose its topicality so long the civilization exists, and there would always be newer concepts to match the future.
However, irrespective of ages, the inner philosophy of parenting has remained the same, and which, rather surprisingly, matches with the contemporary philosophy of globalization too, which is, gaining sustainable competitive advantage! It might sound crude, yet it is true that investing knowledge and energy in parenting can be beneficial for the parents in many ways, the least of which, viz. , self-satisfaction, can surpass even all other achievements of the parents, as self-satisfaction is considered as one of the top-rung needs of humans, the “esteem need”, if Abraham Maslow’s “Hierarchy of Needs” (Maslow’s, 2008) has anything to go by.
So far so good, but parenting is something easier said than is to be done, because its requirements are more than it meets the eye, and for that matter, the parents themselves need to “grow” along with their children in terms of knowledge and application, besides developing an eye for detail to identify the needs which children may not express clearly. In all, this is not just an issue that needs to be clinically settled, and instead, it should have sanctions of heart too – because, successful parenting has a great emotional bearing on the parents as well as on the children.
But, what can be the wining recipe of successful parenting? This essay searches an answer to this question with the help of the article, ” Parenting”, and evaluates the first-hand account of parenting by its author to underpin the prime components associated with parenting, before reaching its conclusion. A First-Person Account of the Initiation with the Topic, Parenting It was raining and I was alone in the house, pondering about how to have a good time, and it was at that moment a thin bunch of papers, visibly a piece of literature, came into my sight.
I picked it up and found the opening interesting, as the author declares right at the outset that no one can be totally equipped as a parent, though one can learn a lot from books or from the advices of other parents, besides learning from the lessons in course of parenting. That observation was followed by a humble admission that she has learned a good many things in her sixteen-year stint with parenting, and the most significant set of lessons among them is the knowledge that parents need to promote their children’s independence, need to teach them by example, to value them as prize possession, and be thankful for their good health.
Such an open admission flashed two ideas on my mind – one, parenting has to be a challenging task, if not daunting, and two, this article, may provide some clues to learn the art and science of parenting. The curiosity to know about the challenge and the prospect of learning how to tackle it increased my interest and I settled down on my couch with the article. The author’s free-flowing style soon made me involved with the nuances of parenting. The Question and the Hypothesis
The authors’ observation, that “parents need to promote their children’s independence, need to teach them by example, to value them as prize possession, and be thankful for their good health,” makes it the hypothesis against the evergreen research question related to parenting: “What can be the wining recipe of successful parenting? ” Therefore I started looking for the evidences in the article that can substantiate such a hypothesis. Review of the Article
The author observes that the new parents seldom realize the degree of responsibility associated with parenting, and fewer of those new parents consider the fact that much of the knowledge about parenting can be learnt during its course itself. While the first point needs no explanation, as inexperience can cause such a situation, but the her next observations deserves to be examined, much like her observation that the most important task of parenting involves promoting children’s independence, to view them as valuable members of the family, be thankful for their good health or to set good examples before them.
And the author substantiates her observation regarding the second point, i. e. , the knowledge about parenting can be learnt during its course itself, as she cites an instance involving her first child Lisa. Children can always startle their parents with new ideas, much the same way as Lisa, the author’s first child, did at the age of three, when, she broke free of her dependency on her favorite cousin, and decided to move on her own.
This instance very much aligns with the inherent trait of humans to respond to the challenge of survival. From parent’s viewpoint, to be the witness of such milestone moments of human life would be a source of joy and inspiration. Thus it was perfectly normal for the parent-author to suddenly discover the involuntary strains of tears going down her cheeks, when she saw Lisa taking the challenge of availing the car-ride all by herself, after her favorite cousin refused to accompany her.
That was the moment when the author discovered two valuable gifts in herself that she could present Lisa – one, the freedom for her to establish her independence, and two, the self-confidence, to take advantage of that freedom. This realization brings forth one important association between freedom and confidence – where freedom’s true exploitation depends on one’s level of self-confidence. Thus, parents should recognize the natural process in a child, which should continuously move towards an independent life, besides realizing the significance of nurturing that process and instilling confidence in them.
Going by the author’s view, this becomes possible for the parents by gradually accommodating one fact in their mind that someday children will have to live on their own. This is true and people from various rank and file expressed the same view in this regard. For example, it is impossible to forget the lines once Kahlil Gibran wrote on parent-child relationship: “Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life Longing for itself. You can house their bodies, but not their minds. For, their minds dwell in the house of tomorrow.. ” (Gibran, 2007).